Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Happy sixteen birthday to Wai Min! Although she will never see this.. ahah!
Missing all my 35th NCO peeps! Memories still stay so good and pretty until now.. =)
Though not in touch anymore, or have forgotten me already, they still stay in my heart like some precious diamond yea..
I can't wait for O lvls to end, and then go meet up with whoever we still keep in touch with now.
Ahhh...
I feel so satisfied today.
I finally realise why Ms Heng would rather talk to us about some unrelated stuffs to history/SS than teaching us with TB.
Life is short.
Maybe i would regret, if i have yet to realise ms heng's purpose.
After i became a leader, i realised.
Humans are actually so fragile, really very fragile..
Even though u don't see them like one, they are actually.. In the inside.
They feel guilty for whatever they do, but in front of you, they act like nothing.
Humans are such great actors, that you will never imagine.
Well, we are good..
I thought about it again..
How i wish i can be a guy! YES!
maybe because sometimes they just make me feel so sick, and irritated.
Why can't girls be like guy?
Well, at least this society made it that males and females are equal.
Ms Heng let us watched some kind of SS Video about Iran.
Females are like treated like some pigeons, or shit hell there.
-They can't show their faces to others, and they need to have their body covered up, not even your feet could be exposed. I bet they are suffocating.
Imagine you smell those cloth every day..
- Need to be accompanied by a male, or a children below 12 wherever you go.
Oh my, if i were born there..
I would rather kill myself first, or yes..
Like the video.. Act and dress up like a guy!
Saturday, April 24, 2010
I need a happy pill.
Why am i always soooo EMO.......
Sad life uhhh..
Always so envious of other people.
When can i ever be proud of myself for doing a great thing.. Like when uhh.
MYE.. last two weeks of June Hols..
I am totally not prepared even when i kept telling myself im gonna do well for it.
It doesn't make sense if i just use my mouth, but not using my brains..
Somehow still worried, what if i couldn't get in the course i want, what if i do badly for my Os.
What if...
Spoke to amalina few days ago, heard her stories, why she ended up as a retainer because she did badly for Os and didnt want to go ITE like some of her classmates.
Its so.. Scary
Now i understand the school's motto of
perseverance.
You will never succeed if you decide to give up at your last lap.
Maybe that is the reason why there is this word called ''consistent''
I need to pace myself.
However, because of this phrase '' Slow and steady wins the race''
Revisions starts now, and yes :)
I am loving Mrs tan's chemistry lesson and i learn that chemistry is really cool.
Don't you think so?
I can't wait for the next chapter that she will be teaching..
hmmm.. Some people ask
Why the hell do we have to study..?
Well,Geography makes me thinks that studying makes everything worthwhile, and how we can make the place we leave in a better one.
The world is just so amazing..
Well, Mrs tan makes me want to become a teacher, like her maybe..
Its just like the joy, how i always love to joke with the juniors, and teaching them in band.
They make my day because they make me feel like i am one of them..
I have to say.
I miss band =(
Once a band member, always a band member.
Hahaha
I dreamt before that ms tan bought the band piece ''You raise me up''
I couldnt believe it that ms tan really bought it for the band!! well, that is after i stepped down.. =(
aha! I can't wait to get the scores! this is killing me.. hahaha!
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Do you know what day is today? haha..
LAST YEAR OF TODAY WAS KRSB SYF '09!!haha, i was the only one who remembered it in the whole band..
We suggested to play Overture No.1 during our free practice time before award's day rehearsal.
It was.. this feeling was great :)
My mind was filled up with many past memories we had together.
They were wonderful.. I still remember i missed bar 52 during my SYF performance and i almost cried.
I was a soloist in eupho section, HFMD.. blah..
Which bar i always played wrongly..
There was this one bar which my senior always told me to put in feeling as if my cat died.
Yeah.. All those thoughts went through my mind.
I don't wish to end this journey though..
All those sorrows, and joy that i have went through with the band.
Challenges that i have never faced outside before in my whole life.
The fact that this society is filled with different types of people and how it is..
Yeah.. Everything that i know.
Can't possibly type all of them out, but i know them real in my heart..
Hmm.. i will miss KRSB like a lot.
But however, i have to give them away and let the sec3s rule the world yeah.. haha
In the end still have to.
Got to concentrate on my O lvls and do well!!
I will definitely go back and help out after my O lvls :)
Thursday, April 1, 2010
I'm shall start complaining..I mean.. Thats it man..
Everybody is going crazy. When can i ever say ''shut up people, i had enough of everything''.
NEVER!
They just don't understand what life is.
COME ON! Be practical!
Definitely with ups and downs yeah, stress and problems everywhere, yes.
I tolerated and gone through everything, and i just wanna give up.
I just seem to not want to give in at all.
I thought i finally know what is ''happiness'', but i was wrong.
I still don't know its true meaning.
I thought it was just doing something i like, and having something i love that gives me happiness.
I went home, it changed. Even though i had my favourite ice-cream today, listening to music, and playing my lovely instrument.
Its so complicated i don't know whether to laugh, cry or scream.
I've lost my emotions, how to express them out.
Blogging is the only way whereby i could express them out in a mild and intelligible way lahh!!
You may not be able to understand if i tell you the whole story.
It doesn't make sense because my life is so screwed up. Really a lot.
----------------------------
Did really badly for Chinese paper, last position in my A class.
Such a disgrace.
From sec1 & 2 A2 drop to some shit C5 and C6
Everything to me is just like so irritating and annoying.
I seriously want to screw my life up by hating everybody around me.
This word ''hatred'' is just like everywhere around me, no matter how much i try to let it go away.
I can't stand my junior anymore!
I regret saying that i did the right choice not giving up on her, and treating her so nicely with patient and that their mindset can be changed. I REGRET!!
No matter how good i treat them or whatever shit! THey don't get it!
ITs their mindset, and its SHITTY SHITTY SHITTY OKAY!!
Its her problem that she don't want to learn, and i tried my best.
I am not her only senior, i do not want to take the blame that i did not do a good job teaching.
Even though i taught her everything i know, she don't give a shit appreciation for it, and treating me like some idiotic senior with no respect at all.
You all have no right to put THE BLAME ON ME OKAY! YOU SEE FOR YOURSELF!
I got so many band stuff to handle, performances, sec1s learning, drills, workshops, everything, logistics, namelist, music wise, spreading of messages,& librarians!
WTH!!!
I got this reason why i do not have time to teach her, and i even send out some shit messages to tell her im willing to take my time out to teach her out of band.
Come one, why am i like begging her to learn? its her problem!
She just gave a shit of nonsense, and then go look for the counselor telling her its all our fault..
Seriously, i am not going to care about her anymore or the section.
Let it die, seriously.
